Two months ago the Lord put it on my heart to fall back from the dating scene for six months. Prior to, in my adult life I’ve pretty much dated throughout my 20s and have invested a lot of time into getting to know guys. I recognized last year that the enemy would often present a guy as a distraction and I found myself always being pursued by a guy at one point or another. The saving grace is that I usually would be very focused and would date with purpose so I was able to discern most non-compatible guys. Last year in particularly, I went through two heart breaks which is pretty significant as I usually would be able to discern whether a relationship was worth the investment before getting too involved. I also don’t give the title of “boyfriend” out loosely as I desire to get married and usually aim to date guys who want the same end goal. Furthermore, to expound on what dating with purpose looks like for me it means; no sex, in depth conversations, fasting, much prayer, studying the bible, Christian teachings, and receiving wise counsel. When those two relationships crumbled to pieces even after my purposeful efforts I felt devastated and burned out.
This year, I went through two other dating disappointments and realizing that we were unequally yoked. It was in May when the Lord told me to start my hiatus from dating. He told me to spend my time getting to know him and pursuing my God-given purpose.
During this dating hiatus I’ve:
- Found peace in knowing that when God is ready he will send that special someone
- How to effectively use my time
- Started writing a book
- Started a podcast
- Received divine ideas about ministry endeavors and non-profit programs to help the community
- Applied to ministry school
- Learned how to be an action taker
- Met a special guy that I look forward to getting to know
Society puts so much pressure on women to be romantically involved in relationships especially when a woman gets around or older than the age of 30. It feels amazing to be unbothered by the pressures and societal expectations of dating. It feels peaceful to be in this place of trusting God with your love story. During this time I have recognized God loves me and that when he is ready he’ll do the thangggg; and when he does, my man will be exceedingly and abundantly about all I may ask or think! No dates, or testosterone or late night romantic conversations for me right now, I have four more months. I can’t wait to finally get to know the special guy that has caught my attention however, I am even more excited about spending this time getting to know God more, starting new endeavors, and walking in purpose.
Maybe you should take a hiatus from dating, cast your cares to God, and intentionally throw yourself into your purpose! You’d be surprised the revelations, insight, and people God will bring into your life as you intentionally focus on him, and his will.