July 2020 – Bloom With Purpose

Two months ago the Lord put it on my heart to fall back from the dating scene for six months. Prior to, in my adult life I’ve pretty much dated throughout my 20s and have invested a lot of time into getting to know guys. I recognized last year that the enemy would often present a guy as a distraction and I found myself always being pursued by a guy at one point or another. The saving grace is that I usually would be very focused and would date with purpose so I was able to discern most non-compatible guys. Last year in particularly, I went through two heart breaks which is pretty significant as I usually would be able to discern whether a relationship was worth the investment before getting too involved. I also don’t give the title of “boyfriend” out loosely as I desire to get married and usually aim to date guys who want the same end goal. Furthermore, to expound on what dating with purpose looks like for me it means; no sex, in depth conversations, fasting, much prayer, studying the bible, Christian teachings, and receiving wise counsel. When those two relationships crumbled to pieces even after my purposeful efforts I felt devastated and burned out.

This year, I went through two other dating disappointments and realizing that we were unequally yoked. It was in May when the Lord told me to start my hiatus from dating. He told me to spend my time getting to know him and pursuing my God-given purpose.

During this dating hiatus I’ve:

Found peace in knowing that when God is ready he will send that special someone
How to effectively use my time
Started writing a book
Started a podcast
Received divine ideas about ministry endeavors and non-profit programs to help the community
Applied to ministry school
Learned how to be an action taker
Met a special guy that I look forward to getting to know

Society puts so much pressure on women to be romantically involved in relationships especially when a woman gets around or older than the age of 30. It feels amazing to be unbothered by the pressures and societal expectations of dating. It feels peaceful to be in this place of trusting God with your love story. During this time I have recognized God loves me and that when he is ready he’ll do the thangggg; and when he does, my man will be exceedingly and abundantly about all I may ask or think! No dates, or testosterone or late night romantic conversations for me right now, I have four more months. I can’t wait to finally get to know the special guy that has caught my attention however, I am even more excited about spending this time getting to know God more, starting new endeavors, and walking in purpose.

Maybe you should take a hiatus from dating, cast your cares to God, and intentionally throw yourself into your purpose! You’d be surprised the revelations, insight, and people God will bring into your life as you intentionally focus on him, and his will.

My whole life has been a journey of faith. I’ve shared on my podcast some of the most excruciating, emotional pain that one can imagine. I shared my story of how I experienced guilt and shame in my teenage years and since my whole life has been one of faith. Faith to believe God will restore my confidence, faith that God will restore broken relationships, faith that my mental health will get better, faith that I will become a well-functioning adult, faith that God will help me graduate college, faith that God will bless me with the right relationship leading to marriage, and faith that I will do well in my ministry and business endeavors.

Faith has encompassed every area of my life. The interesting part about faith is that it is unseen, it is the substance of things hoped for. That means that our hopes are a form of faith and that it is the evidence of that which is not seen. The thing about faith is that even when your circumstances don’t line up with what God told you; faith says that “this too shall pass”, “all things work together for your good”, “surely goodness and mercy shall follow you all the days of your life”. Faith calls the things not as they are but as they will be.

Faith speaks to your insecurities and fears and tells them to shut up! An interesting part about faith is that even if you feel afraid you just need faith the grain of a mustard seed in order to move a mountain (get through a hardship). Even when fear is present, I challenge you to choose faith. Choose faith over doubts. Choose faith over negative thinking. Choose faith over insecurities.

You can feel the fear but still choose faith anyway, so I encourage you to FAITH it until you make it! All you need is a mustard seed of faith to move mountains! Have you told your mountains about your God yet? I encourage you to do so. Most of the time fear comes as a result of when we are about to do something brave, so I encourage you to do whatever it is! Do it in faith and remember that God did not give you a spirit of fear but one of power, love, and a strong mind. Faith it baby, faith it! All you need is a lil’ bit to do powerful things!